A Little Step of Faith

For any of you who have known me well, it may come as a shock to you that I actually attended a college party tonight (sans alcohol of course) and truly enjoyed the whole thing. For the rest of you wondering why that's such a big deal, I'm going to divulge you on a little unknown tidbit about me and how God has worked through that piece of me to bring me where I am today. Read on!

Most people get somewhat nervous at the thought of branching out and meeting new people - but few people feel the level of anxiety I usually get in that sort of a situation. It's called social anxiety, and it's considered a sort of disorder that comes along side a lot of other disorders. Well, all that anticipation and thinking about the situation never gives me a chance to settle down and clearly think through a coming event in a rational way. It, in fact, does the opposite, gets me more worked up. But tonight was different - for the first time that I can remember, I had the opportunity to go to a party with a lot of people (we're talking at least 30 people I had NEVER met before - usually 5 unknown people is pushing it for me) and I was looking forward to it! Trust me, I used to never look forward to large parties unless there was some way that I could be assured that I would always have one of my close friends right next to me the whole time.

Anyway, I took the chance of being the one to ask a friend if she was going, and even had the guts to ask if I could tag along (I really don't like being the awkward new girl in a group of established friends). It was totally ok! Our little car of people got to know each other on the ride and the rest just kind of happened. Turns out, I wasn't the only one who knew hardly anyone, and because I didn't know anyone, I didn't have to live up to the expectations of the people around me - I could just BE me. What a freeing feeling it is to just be yourself.

Let me add that this party was sponsored by one of the Christian groups on campus, but the atmosphere was different from really any Christian social event I had ever been to. Just by being near these people you can tell they are all genuinely living life for God and His purposes. There was nothing selfish, mean, rude, or inconsiderate about anyone. That's not an easy thing to find, my friends. God has taken what could have been a really rough transition into a new group of people and made it one of the most rewarding things I've ever taken a chance on. Not that He hasn't proven His faithfulness enough already, but He continues to do so every time I step out and trust Him a little with an area of my life that has always been a struggle.

This is just one of many of those problem areas, but I can tell you all, God is ready whenever you are to take that step and make your life reflect His glory, even in completely unexpected ways. This morning I was contemplating skipping this party because I thought my anxiety would get in the way and make things awkward. I even had a friend on backup for me to call or text if I needed her support through this. But I didn't even once think to call or text her or anyone else! It really is God working in me to get me through an event like this with just the people I'm surrounded by. I'm so thankful for what He's doing, and I can't begin to say how much I would have missed out on by not going to the party tonight.

Life throws us a lot of little obstacles, but I'm learning everyday to look at them as if they were opportunities for a better tomorrow, not roadblocks for today.